Laurie: Oh Superman
The world as I see it in 2018 is in trouble.
The rise of Religious intolerance, Religious Fundamentalism, Terrorism, Overpopulation, Climate Extremes, Energy Shortages, Sexual Discrimination, Pollution and in-numeral more.
If only there was some sort of Superman or Superwoman available to help put things right.
By dutifully searching the Internet I have began to lock onto what must be an extraordinary person. I have tracked down something called twitter where it is has been written:
I too have a Nuclear Button, but it is a much bigger & more powerful one than his
My I.Q. is one of the highest - and you all know it!
I will be the best by far in fighting terror
I will be the greatest job-producing president in American history
I am the BEST builder, just look at what I've built
I am the best builder but if that were my building with the crane mishap...
I am attracting the biggest crowds, by far, and the best poll numbers, also by far.
I am least racist person there is
Many people have commented that my fragrance, “Success” is the best scent & lasts the longest
Many people have said I’m the world’s greatest writer of 140 character sentences.
Many are saying I'm the best 140 character writer in the world
But wait, there is more:
Nobody knows jobs like I do!
Nobody understands politicians like I do
Nobody beats me on National Security
No-one has done more for people with disabilities than me
Infrastructure I am the only one that knows how to build cities
ISIS ISIS is still running around wild. I can fix it fast
Terrorism TIME FOR A CHANGE, I WILL SOLVE - AND FAST!
Veterans Affairs I will fix VA quickly.
And upon Global Warming they hath speaketh
total, and very expensive, hoax!
Global warming, again, is a con!
total con job
based on faulty science and manipulated data
proven to be a canard repeatedly over and over again
we didn't cause it
was created by and for the Chinese
The Twitter Archive
Deadringers New Years Eve
My Button is Bigger
I Like Big Buttons and I Cannot Lie